But I’m still having fun and I guess that's the key, I'm a twentysomething and I'll keep being me.

My family always teases me at my uncanny ability to remember what I and others were wearing on almost any given day, any year ago. Well, really only on days when something important happened, or days when pictures were taken. Sifting through my wardrobe, deciding what to donate and what to take with me into my new life of pseudo-adulthood, I keep stumbling across articles of clothing that take me back years in time. I've found shirts I wore in my high school senior pictures, during Welcome Week and the outfit I wore on my first day of college.

I remember that day because I kept debating whether to wear sunglasses across campus or not. I mean, it was hot and sunny, and it was hard to see things as I made the walk from Nelson Hall to Gibson Health Center for my Personal Wellness or Fitness or whatever those intro classes are called.

The campus had been filled with eager-eyed fish like myself during Welcome Week, along with the occasional upperclassman with a different colored T-shirt telling me where to go. But now - oh man. The campus was a sea of older college kids who looked so much smarter, mature and ready for the world than I did. As I walked past the Bible building and the creepy statue in my pink Old Navy tee, I was freakishly self-conscious about whether I should keep my sunglasses on or not, not to mention doubting my entire identity in general.

I've collected about 50 ACU-related shirts over the past four years. I bought most of them (sorry, Dad), but a few were given to me or were picked up along the way. I don't really need these shirts, 10 of which are purple, so I guess I'll donate them along to someone who does. Maybe some kid will wear an ACU shirt and be motivated to attend the school, thus going on to earn an education and, in turn, change the world. It could happen.

It's weird to think that it was less than four years ago that I looked at people my age with such a sense of awe. Now, I've been spit out of the system that I had once been so excited to enter in to. The whirlwind of finals and all-nighters only led to a lame Graduation Celebration, complete with a laser show, and then Graduation. Now, my roommate is gone and I'm left trying to comprehend the past four years and the notion that I can never have them again. I'm folding up my T-shirts and giving them away.

My current state of confusion is only fitting considering my complete lack of motivation this past semester. Thank God for being able to take classes credit/non-credit, meaning I was aiming for 60s in three of my classes. My other two I actually had to take for a grade, and earned one A and one B (Whatever, Dr. Ash. Whatever.). Oh well. That's over with. Now for the real world?

I'm still packing. Maybe moving out will bring some closure. Probably not, though. Here's to the next years of being a twentysomething with no clue who they are or what they want to do. At least I had a great four years to help delay the inevitable: growing up.

Oh Holy God No

No no no no no no no not another one no no no no no.

Jeb Would Make a 'Great President,' Bush Says

By Bill Brubaker
Washington Post Staff Writer
Thursday, May 11, 2006; Page A06

Coming soon: President Bush III?

The second -- and current -- President Bush suggested yesterday that his younger brother, Florida Gov. Jeb Bush, would make a "great president."

"I would like to see Jeb run at some point in time, but I have no idea if that's his intention or not," Bush said in an interview with Florida reporters, according to a story on the St. Petersburg Times Web site.

If that sounds familiar, the Bush brothers' father, former president George H.W. Bush, made a similar statement last year, telling CNN's Larry King that Jeb Bush would be "awfully good" as president.

"This guy's smart, big and strong. Makes the decisions," the first President Bush said then.

Two brothers have never been elected to serve as U.S. president.

Jeb Bush, 53, who cannot seek reelection after his second term as governor ends in January, has repeatedly said that he will not run for president in 2008, just before his brother leaves the White House.

But that has not stopped at least two fellow Republicans -- his father and his older brother -- from planting the idea.

President Bush said in the interview that he has "pushed" his brother "fairly hard about what he intends to do."

The president said: "I have no idea what he's going to do. I've asked him that question myself. I truly don't think he knows."

In May 2005, King asked the senior Bush if he wanted Jeb Bush to run for president.

"Someday I would, yes," George H.W. Bush said.

"Is the timing wrong now, though?" King asked.

"Yes. The timing's wrong," Bush said. "The main thing is, he doesn't want to do it. Nobody believes that, but . . ."

In yesterday's interview, President Bush said his brother could have a "very bright" political future.

Reality check for 'Dreamz:' film's not funny

April 28, 2006

Stephen Colbert is brilliant.

Monday through Thursday nights on Comedy Central's "The Colbert Report," Colbert takes on the persona of a right wing, in-your-face TV news pundit who'll defend the Bush administration to the death. He's like Bill O'Reilly, only likable.

It's all an act, though, and his shtick only works because his impersonations of the pundits are dead-on, inane outcries about the government and all. He's studied his targets and by taking on their characteristics, he is able to in turn make fun of them by pointing out their flaws through irony, sarcasm and wit. That's the nature of a satire.

American Dreamz wants to be as funny and satirical as an episode of "The Colbert Report" or "The Daily Show With Jon Stewart" but fails miserably. In what could have been an interesting look at pop culture, writer and director Paul Weitz (American Pie, About a Boy, In Good Company) instead overreaches in this silly excuse for a satire that draws more yawns than chuckles.

The film attempts to be an indictment on American society - one that is at war in Iraq, lead by a less-than-smart president with a chief of staff who does all the talking, and in which a popular TV show that finds the next big pop star garners more public interest than current affairs.

Sounds familiar. Still, the film pulls punches left and right and takes easy shots at the president and other Americans that never follow through.

Martin Tweed (Hugh Grant) hosts the phenomenally popular reality show "American Dreamz," a play on "American Idol," and is a cross between the real show's snotty British judge, Simon Cowell, and pretentious host, Ryan Seacrest. Tweed has no morals or integrity and only cares about the bottom line: what will bring in more ratings.

For the next season of "American Dreamz," Tweed scours the country in search of the next poor soul he and his producers can market to America. Playing the blonde, small town girl-next-door is Sally Kendoo (Mandy Moore). Providing the ethnic variety for the show is Omer (Sam Golzari), a trained Iraqi terrorist, with a passion for show tunes, sent to live with relatives in Orange County, Calif.

While Tweed is casting the next season of the show, trouble is brewing in Washington. President Staton (Dennis Quaid), fresh off re-election and an obvious parody of President Bush, has decided to take a break from running the country by closing himself off in his room and reading newspapers and books, items he usually has avoided. His chief of staff (Willem Dafoe), who looks a lot like Vice President Dick Cheney, does the talking for him, and along with the first lady (Marcia Gay Harden), consoles Staton and encourages him to stop reading and get back out in public.

Once members of the press begin questioning the mental stability of the president, the unnamed chief of staff swiftly attempts to save face by scheduling back-to-back public appearances for Staton, including one as a guest judge on the "American Dreamz" finale.

Making Staton have the mental capacity of a third-grader is the easy way out, and here's where Weitz could have learned a trick or two from Colbert. Staton is the version of Bush that some critics assume is the reality, not the persona presented to the American public. Bush has his verbal gaffs and incredulous facial expressions, so why not use those as a starting point for a characterization?

One scene shows Staton describing his belief that he's been appointed by God to his position of power, and another shows the chief of staff telling the White House press core to not ask questions about the president and to remember that, because the country is at war, they should focus on what's really important. These critiques of current trends in our society are not without merit, but they're not fully developed.

Because Weitz doesn't delve into the real problems behind these characters, based on real people, the critiques are barely noted and come across as merely whines from self-proclaimed martyrs. These issues deserve more than the canned presumptions displayed in the film.

The scenes between Staton and his chief of staff fall flat because there's no meat to them. There's a line somewhere between imitating a person and imitating an idea of a person or a caricature of them. It's thin, but it's there. Will Ferrell impersonating Bush on "Saturday Night Live:" funny. President Staton in American Dreamz: not funny.

Moore makes an impressive turn as Sally, proving she's grown past her teen pop days. Too bad this film's humor isn't as biting as another film of Moore's, Saved! It's also unfortunate that Jennifer Coolidge (Best in Show, American Pie, Legally Blonde) wasn't given better material to work with to deliver her usual, hilarious deadpan. Grant's portrayal of Tweed is confusing; we see glimpses of humanity coming from him, or a deeper sense of self-awareness than you'd expect, but they're few and far between.

In American Dreamz, Weitz apparently wants to comment on the state of American society and our preference to choose our own reality - believe what we want to believe - rather than accept the reality that's been dealt to us. He's got a point, but it's lost amid the fruitless noise coming from the underdeveloped and stereotypical characters' mouths.

His previous films, mainly About a Boy, have had a certain charm and wit to them that American Dreamz lacks. The only thing I left the theatre with was a bitter taste in my mouth and a shared sense of his disillusionment.

Toward the end of the film, one of the characters says that Americans can't be held responsible for the actions of their country, which was surprising to hear. Perhaps Weitz forgot to take his own advice and did what he is criticizing others for: he created his own version of reality.

American society deserves its share of criticism, as does the current administration, but American Dreamz doesn't cut it.

Pieter Bruegel, "The Parable of the Blind Leading the Blind"

My friend and I thought this painting would look great on the back of a Students' Association shirt. We'd have the SA logo on the front, then Bruegel's piece on the back. No description necessary. We could probably sell them to the rest of the student body and use the revenue on something they want instead of on, you know, office supplies and executive officer scholarships. (I still love you, Mr. Scott).

Where the crap is Walt?

The definition of Senioritis: At about 4:30 p.m. today, I realized I had completely forgotten to go to my 1 p.m. class. It hadn't even crossed my mind all day. Only when I saw the textbook for that class in my bag did I realize I had missed it. I'm going insane.

- - - - - -

It's disappointing that I've been able to guess the major plot twists on "Lost" the past two episodes. If I'm half-heartedly guessing the big secret at the end, J.J. Abrams, you just aren't trying hard enough. Get it together, man. Season's almost over. Impress me.

- - - - - -

I've already been to the new Starbucks on campus three times today. You will rarely see me without a Starbucks cup in my hand from now until graduation. I'm testing how much caffeine one person can handle.

I Like This.

My look-alike, J.K. Rowling (I just call her Jo when we hang out), recently posted this article on her Web site. It's been picked up by various media, some praising her, some critisizing. I'm not sure how you can make a strong argument against her opinions that our society is weight-obsessed, but then again, people will argue about anything. Just look at me.


For Girls Only, Probably...

Being thin. Probably not a subject that you ever expected to read about on this website, but my recent trip to London got me thinking...

It started in the car on the way to Leavesden film studios. I whiled away part of the journey reading a magazine that featured several glossy photographs of a very young woman who is either seriously ill or suffering from an eating disorder (which is, of course, the same thing); anyway, there is no other explanation for the shape of her body. She can talk about eating absolutely loads, being terribly busy and having the world's fastest metabolism until her tongue drops off (hooray! Another couple of ounces gone!), but her concave stomach, protruding ribs and stick-like arms tell a different story. This girl needs help, but, the world being what it is, they're sticking her on magazine covers instead. All this passed through my mind as I read the interview, then I threw the horrible thing aside.

But blow me down if the subject of girls and thinness didn't crop up shortly after I got out of the car. I was talking to one of the actors and, somehow or other, we got onto the subject of a girl he knows (not any of the Potter actresses – somebody from his life beyond the films) who had been dubbed 'fat' by certain charming classmates. (Could they possibly be jealous that she knows the boy in question? Surely not!)

'But,' said the actor, in honest perplexity, 'she is really not fat.'

'"Fat" is usually the first insult a girl throws at another girl when she wants to hurt her,' I said; I could remember it happening when I was at school, and witnessing it among the teenagers I used to teach. Nevertheless, I could see that to him, a well-adjusted male, it was utterly bizarre behaviour, like yelling 'thicko!' at Stephen Hawking.

His bemusement at this everyday feature of female existence reminded me how strange and sick the 'fat' insult is. I mean, is 'fat' really the worst thing a human being can be? Is 'fat' worse than 'vindictive', 'jealous', 'shallow', 'vain', 'boring' or 'cruel'? Not to me; but then, you might retort, what do I know about the pressure to be skinny? I'm not in the business of being judged on my looks, what with being a writer and earning my living by using my brain...

I went to the British Book Awards that evening. After the award ceremony I bumped into a woman I hadn't seen for nearly three years. The first thing she said to me? 'You've lost a lot of weight since the last time I saw you!'

'Well,' I said, slightly nonplussed, 'the last time you saw me I'd just had a baby.'

What I felt like saying was, 'I've produced my third child and my sixth novel since I last saw you. Aren't either of those things more important, more interesting, than my size?' But no – my waist looked smaller! Forget the kid and the book: finally, something to celebrate!

So the issue of size and women was (ha, ha) weighing on my mind as I flew home to Edinburgh the next day. Once up in the air, I opened a newspaper and my eyes fell, immediately, on an article about the pop star Pink.

Her latest single, 'Stupid Girls', is the antidote-anthem for everything I had been thinking about women and thinness. 'Stupid Girls' satirises the talking toothpicks held up to girls as role models: those celebrities whose greatest achievement is un-chipped nail polish, whose only aspiration seems to be getting photographed in a different outfit nine times a day, whose only function in the world appears to be supporting the trade in overpriced handbags and rat-sized dogs.

Maybe all this seems funny, or trivial, but it's really not. It's about what girls want to be, what they're told they should be, and how they feel about who they are. I've got two daughters who will have to make their way in this skinny-obsessed world, and it worries me, because I don't want them to be empty-headed, self-obsessed, emaciated clones; I'd rather they were independent, interesting, idealistic, kind, opinionated, original, funny – a thousand things, before 'thin'. And frankly, I'd rather they didn't give a gust of stinking chihuahua flatulence whether the woman standing next to them has fleshier knees than they do. Let my girls be Hermiones, rather than Pansy Parkinsons. Let them never be Stupid Girls. Rant over.

Where's my billion-dollar income?

Thanks to the folks at MyHeritage.com, as well as those at VHI's Best Week Ever who told me about the Web site, I'm now certain that 70 percent of my face looks like J.K. Rowling. In the running: Daryl Hannah, 68 percent; Demi Moore, 66 percent; Glenn Close, 64 percent; Ricki Lake, 62 percent; Jennifer Garner, 59 percent; Jennifer Love Hewitt, 58 percent; Neve Campbell, 57 percent; Debra Winger, 57 percent; and Holly Marie Combs, 57 percent. OK, OK, so I don't look like any of these women, but one can dream.

Funny, yet wrong on so many levels.

(From Sojourners' April Fools Edition) SATIRE: Pentagon investigation clears Cheney of wrongdoing in seal-clubbing incident

Cheney, wearing his custom- tailored seal-clubbing suit, prepares to club a baby seal.

ANCHORAGE, Alaska - Dentist Michael MacKenzie is in serious but stable condition following an accident while on an Alaskan baby seal-clubbing expedition with Vice President Dick Cheney. Cheney was in the process of clubbing a 1-week-old baby harp seal when MacKenzie somehow got in the way, sustaining a concussion, broken jaw, and several missing teeth.

Asked to comment, MacKenzie stated, "Umph schmph fluh shuh buh fuh," as his jaw is wired shut and his mouth stuffed with gauze. In comments scrawled on hospital stationery, he said that he harbors no ill will towards the vice president: "I realize that it's all just part of the sporting risk and giddy thrill of baby seal clubbing. More morphine, please."

A Pentagon investigation into the matter has determined that Cheney did nothing wrong, as his executive office affords him the privilege of ignoring international conventions regarding the clubbing of both seals and dentists. A Pentagon spokesperson also indicated that the vice president overpaid $7 for his baby seal clubbing license, and should seek reimbursement from the state game warden.

Animal rights leaders have expressed outrage; they're very good at it. Seal-clubbing safety experts have also expressed concern.

In response to waves of criticism, Cheney plans to go on FOX "News" in four days and say he's sorry for clubbing his friend but that the Iraq war is an unparalleled success.

Reports have also noted that Cheney has restricted his outdoor sporting companions to members of unpopular professions in order to mute public outcry in the event of an accident. MacKenzie, 65, is a dentist, 78-year-old Harry Whittington, whom Cheney shot in the face with a shotgun earlier this year, is a lawyer, and Ronald DuPre, a campaign donor who was accidentally harpooned while on a dolphin hunting tour earlier this year, is a DMV attendant. Reports indicate that Geoffrey Payton, a parking enforcement officer with whom Cheney had scheduled an outing to go dynamite fishing this June, has since cancelled the trip and moved to an undisclosed location.

Lee delves ‘Inside’ realm of NYC power players

Published March 31, 2006

Going in to any movie helmed by director Spike Lee ensures only one thing: You'll be challenged to think about life's everyday situations more critically than perhaps you had before.

"Inside Man" is more than your average bank-heist caper, with writer Russell Gewirtz and Lee interjecting sharp glimpses of American society and racial tensions still present on every street corner, no matter the neighborhood. In addition to the ever-present racial dialogue normal to Lee, here we examine the corrupting power of wealth, and power in general.

Dalton Russell (Owen) has planned the perfect bank robbery, targeting Manhattan Trust in New York City with a team of three, apparently thinking of every possible flaw to his plan beforehand. His team walks into the bank dressed as painters with hats, sunglasses and fabric covering their faces, taking the customers and workers hostage and waiting for the police to begin negotiations.

Detective Keith Frazier (Washington) is no stranger to negotiating with criminals, and he and his partner Bill Mitchell (Chiwetel Ejiofor) set up camp, working alongside the police and strategizing their next move. Washington himself is no stranger to playing a cop, and here we're treated to his typical genial mannerisms and wit, but not much more.

While Frazier negotiates with Russell, a new problem in the form of Madeline White (Foster) appears at the blocked-off street corner in front of the bank. Madeline's a key power player in New York, though we never know her exact job. Bank owner Arthur Case (Christopher Plummer) contacted her, asking her to use her skills to protect his mysterious belongings kept in one of the bank's safety deposit boxes.

Foster brings a level of class and artistry to her films that most actresses would murder to have. Here, as the powerful Madeline, she never loses her smile and posits her, at times, unethical requests with a serpentine sweetness you know has carried her to her current status.

The story weaves between action inside the bank and future interrogation scenes of the hostages, each one carrying his own story, stereotypes and opinions on how the robbery went. New York City is its own character, an undeniable melting pot of the American Dream. But what are these dreams built on, and more pertinent here, what have those who've risen to power done to achieve them?

Owen is brilliant in anything he does and can command attention on the screen even when concealed behind sunglasses and a mask. Though we don't see as much of him or learn as much about his character, what Dalton does do and say is never without great consideration and purpose. He says it himself in the opening dialogue of the film: You'd better listen to him carefully, because he never repeats himself.

Entertaining and thought provoking, the film dabbles in civics lessons and sociological studies in addition to its thrilling twists and turns. Unlike certain films, like "Crash," which tell you in practically every frame how important and serious it is, "Inside Man" allows the viewer to decide for himself the lessons to be learned.

Though more mainstream than Lee's typical work, "Inside Man" is a smart thriller that asks important questions, which are all too relevant in our present society to be ignored.

Visit rouses questions, not answers

March 29, 2006

Battling sleep deprivation, stress and nerves, I followed members of Soulforce's Equality Ride around Monday, talking one-on-one with several of the riders and attending various forums.

Each hour brought with it more unanswered questions, and when people occasionally asked how my day was going, I probably unnerved them when I relayed my ensuing existential breakdown before moving to the next event.

My confusion probably mirrors many students' with Soulforce's visit producing more questions than answers. Aside from our now-permanent red handprints from self-congratulatory pats on the back on how we handled the situation, th repercussions of this visit are far from over and the journey ahead for the university in regards to its discussions on sexuality remains unclear.

It's easy for a group of straight Christians to come to a conclusion on homosexuality, but when you're looking a gay man, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered person in the eye, you're forced to reconsider the lessons you've been taught.

The most telling conversations during the visit occurred in closed sessions, mainly during small groups' discussions during meals or in invitation-only forums where students were allowed to ask Soulforce members anything they wanted. Yet even these conversations were stilted to a degree, and upon reflection of the day's events, neither ACU nor Soulforce truly engaged in an open dialogue with the other.

Yes, we were nice to them and cared for them. We opened our doors; provided ARAMARK meals, microphones and PowerPoint presentation capabilities; but were we fair to them? Our constant call was to love them as Christ loves us, but how can you love someone without really listening to them? Not hearing -- listening.

We -- ACU and Soulforce -- each entered the arena with our minds made up. We knew where we stood, but avoided turning to scripture for fear of inciting a feud. Those planning the event feared overindoctrinating us, and a point-counterpoint battle about scripture would have served no purpose. Still, the conversation about why we each believe what we do should have been had in a more public venue.

So we stood there, gazing at each other from across the confusing divide, mainly thankful that violence hadn't erupted, but our intellectual dishonesty damaged our chances of making headway on the topic of homosexuality.

When students mingled with the riders in the afternoon in the Hilton Room, many asked questions and listened to the personal stories of the 34 people traveling cross-country to make their point. To say the least, the sight of the various clumps of talking students and Soulforce members was inspiring. But this much honesty could not be found during official meeting times when university representatives spoke, constantly aware of the image they must maintain and the stances from which they were told not to stray.

The conversations must continue, and perhaps the administration will provide more opportunities for students to ask questions openly in a non-threatening environment - a place we can productively delve into scripture, not use it as a trump card to stifle conversation.

Although it's understandable this type of environment can't occur with 4,000 people in a coliseum, more small-group gatherings and forums should be formed to address the issues brought to students' attention because of Soulforce.

Surely there must be a balance between yielding your time on the floor without yielding your position. We haven't found it yet, but we stepped closer to it Monday. Now we just need to start walking.

Remember, Remember, the 5th of November

I thoroughly enjoyed V for Vendetta, and you should all read its review by my friend Dee Travis. It takes a while to get used to watching the character of V on screen, him never taking off his mask and having to use his body language to make up for the loss of using facial expression to convey an emotion. But, even though we can't see his face, I couldn't help picturing the actor behind the mask, Hugo Weaving, throughout the film. I mean, it's Elrond. Or 'that guy from The Matrix.' Still, he's great, and watching the anarchy he initiates was highly entertaining and disturbing all at once. Tchaikovsky's "1812 Overture" will never be the same for me again.

i want one.

I'm not sure what chemicals in my brain are triggered when I see this picture of Tai Shan, a panda cub at the National Zoo in Washington, D.C., but I smile, squint my eyes and start making baby noises. Daniel said he saw a show about this reaction on TLC one time, saying that when we see something like this panda, or a baby, or hear one crying, something in our brains clicks and we go into defense-mode, wanting to protect it. All I know is that this panda is freaking cute, so here are more pictures to make you smile this Friday (I'm so cheesy).

S-E-N-I-O-R-I-T-I-S

I'm losing my mind. All spring break while at home, I had the feeling that I had left my apartment unlocked. I had daydreams of my roommate coming home early to find our apartment emptied of its valuables, then calling and yelling at me. I mailed of job applications this week, realizing too little too late that I had a typo on my cover page. I sent jobs for copy editing positions that mentioned looking forward to discussing a reporting internship position at the bottom of my letter. At least I didn't misspell California (Daniel). When I drove back to Abilene today, I missed my turn after Brady and ended up having to double back (because I don't have a map in my car), adding a good 45 minutes to my trip. I have no desire to go to class or do schoolwork and have spent the past few days only caring about rereading Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, which is still amazing.

All this to say, please don't ask me what I'm doing after graduation, or if I'm still looking, or what I want to be when I grow up, etc. I am fully aware that I need to find a place of employment. So, for now, please think of another conversation starter. If you can't and choose to small talk with me about future plans because you can't think of anything else, then you probably don't know me very well anyways, and I'll just make this easy and say now that I don't feel like talking to you.

Side Note: PAUL ANTHONY: WHERE IS YOUR BLOG? I AM UPSET.

Wikipedia, which helped me not completely fail my Judaism midterm, has a great page about Senioritis. A great excerpt:

Medically speaking, Senioritis is an affective psychological disorder, similar to other affective disorders (depression, anxiety, and in particular attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder). It is not recognized by the American Psychological Association as a distinct illness, but may generally be considered as a combination of attention-deficit disorder and amotivational syndrome.

Senioritis does not affect all people in the same way. While some show apathy, others show mania. In this way, the syndrome can prevent students from performing routine tasks because of the heightened stress associated with preparing for graduation. When taking excessive course loads to fulfill scholastic requirements, many seniors show an inability to find work, control emotional swings, consummate relationships, maintain personal hygiene, etc.

I understand completely.

God's Lovin' It

You need to go and watch this video - The McPassion. I think it's hilarious, but then again, like the filmmakers, people think I'm bitter and blasphemous, too. Here's Terry Mattingly's column explaining it:


WASHINGTON BUREAU: Terry Mattingly's religion column for 3/15/06.

People are supposed to meditate in church, but the epiphany that rocked
filmmaker Rik Swartzwelder two years ago was different.

It started when he visited several churches in Charlotte, N.C., while
visiting family. In service after service he heard preachers telling
people it was their "Christian duty" to rush out and buy a ticket for "The
Passion of the Christ." There were brochures for Mel Gibson's bloody epic
in the bulletins, posters in sanctuary lobbies and preview clips for the
faithful.

Swartzwelder began thinking about the biblical drama in which, as St. Mark
said, "Jesus went into the temple, and began to cast out them that sold
and bought in the temple, and overthrew the tables of the moneychangers,
and the seats of them that sold doves; And would not suffer that any man
should carry any vessel through the temple."

So he pounded out a sarcastic -- some would say bitter or blasphemous --
script entitled "The McPassion," a feverish vision of what would happen if
Hollywood and the fast-food industry teamed up to sell Holy Week. The
script sat on a shelf until Swartzwelder decided that Tinseltown's love
affair with born-again marketing was growing instead of fading.

The results have been posted at www.TheMcPassion.com, a 4-minute blast
that opens with chipper children scarfing down their McPassion meals,
complete with a crown of thorns and round fries that the announcer notes
are "shaped just like the Eucharist." Then there's the McLast Supper from
Burger King of Kings or the McLoaves and Fish Sticks dinner (all you can
eat, while supplies last). The meals come with toys, like the pretend
stigmata tattoos, a simulated leather cat of nine tails, Shroud of Turin
towelettes, a kid-sized crucifix and the "cool McPassion hammer."

The pitch ends with this call to commerce: "Buy one today! Make Jesus
happy! ... Alleluia, God's lovin' it!"

None of this is terribly subtle.

"I want people to wince," said Swartzwelder. "I wince when the girl says
that dipping the body of Christ in ketchup is fun. I wince when the boy
hits the girl's palm with the toy hammer and you hear that clink, clink
sound."

The goal was to inspire heated discussions and Swartzwelder and director
Benjamin Hershleder were more than willing to infuriate many Christian
viewers in order to get their point across. The result was an online
firestorm that has been both painful and gratifying.

"I keep reminding people that I am a Christian and that, if they really
want to know, I am a big fan of what I thought was a courageous movie by
Mel Gibson," said Swartzwelder, a freelance filmmaker in Burbank, Calif.
He is best known as the creator of "The Least of These," a short film
released in 2002 that won 27 awards and played at mainstream and religious
film festivals around the world.

The Emmy Award-winner stressed that he is glad that "The Passion" rang up
$370 million at the U.S. box office, opening doors for more artists to
make more films -- From "The Exorcism of Emily Rose" to "The End of the
Spear" -- that can tap into a faith-friendly marketplace out in Middle
America. As an admirer of Christian apologist C.S. Lewis, he is glad that
the "The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe" is
rising toward $290 million in U.S. ticket sales.

Swartzwelder is even pleased that many evangelicals, after decades of
merely throwing stones at Hollywood, are now seeking positive ways to
engage the world of entertainment.

The problem, he said, is that some religious leaders have allowed movie
publicity campaigns to bleed out of the marketplace and into the church
sanctuaries that are supposed to be safe havens for vulnerable souls.

"At some point we have to ask: What is the purpose of worship? What is the
purpose of the pulpit?", asked Swartzwelder, who also has led filmmaking
workshops at Calvin College in Grand Rapids, Mich.

"Even with the best of intentions, using the pulpit to push movies -- even
good ones -- is dangerous. And what happens when we start seeing more
people making more movies for this audience? How do we decide which movies
to plug? There could be, no there will be, abuses and that's going to lead
us into murky waters."

so much free time on my hands

Sarah -- [adjective]: Pretentiously academian 'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Chappelle, Brooklyn, throw 'Party' to remember

Published March 10, 2006
The Optimist

On a September day in 2004, residents from neighborhoods in Brooklyn, N.Y., and Dayton, Ohio, experienced "the greatest single day" of comedian Dave Chappelle's career.

Using his celebrity connections with major rap, hip hop and soul artists, Chappelle gathered his performer friends together to treat a corner of Brooklyn to its own block party, documented in the appropriately named "Dave Chappelle's Block Party" - a testament to the power of music and, as cliché as it is, the American dream.

The documentary/concert film begins with a scene of a Brooklyn bystander whose car won't start. Chappelle has been roaming the streets the day before the concert with a bullhorn announcing the party, and he and his crew film the interaction of the bystander and another man trying to help him start his car.

Next, we travel back two days to Chappelle's hometown of Dayton, Ohio, where he, again, roams the streets, announcing his concert and passing out golden tickets for random residents to travel by bus to Brooklyn for the free show. All types of people agree to come, from young black kids who worship Chappelle because of his Comedy Central show, or older white grandmothers who see him around town and just think he's funny.

It's after seeing the sequences in Dayton that the opening car repair scene makes sense. Chappelle is trying to show real people in real settings, ultimately bringing them all together for a concert, transcending the boundaries of race or social class for the sake of entertainment.

That summary may be slightly bloated. Chappelle's intentions aren't to change the world, just to deliver a great night of music to a variety of people. Still, through his endeavors, he manages to deliver an entertaining glimpse into the lives of the artists performing and those lucky enough to come along for the ride.

The highlights of the show come from Kanye West, Mos Def, The Roots, John Legend, Erykah Baduh, Jill Scott and, reunited for the first time in seven years, the Fugees. Even if you're not into rap or hip hop, watching the performances intertwined with backstage encounters and Chappelle's comedy is sure to have you smiling and wishing you had been there.

A highlight of the film comes from the marching band at Ohio Central State University, a group that's invited by Chappelle to join the caravan of charter buses from Ohio to New York to open the party. The students are star-struck and are thrilled to perform "Jesus Walks" alongside Kanye West, and to talk with Wyclef Jean of the Fugees about their futures.

Jean talks with the students, all of whom are black, about how lucky they are to have the opportunity to have an education and that they shouldn't blame society or any other race for problems in their life. They have a say in their future, and they should make it the best they can. All are wide-eyed and encouraged, having heard what really is the heart of the film: taking advantage of opportunities and following your dreams.

The neighborhood Chappelle selects for the block party is an area of Brooklyn where several famous rappers were raised, from Jay-Z to Mos Def to Biggie Smalls. The artists were fortunate enough to strike it big, becoming successful in their fields but not forgetting their roots. Informal interviews with the stars are interspersed throughout, providing a glimpse into who they are, where they came from and the struggles it took to achieve success.

"Block Party" wouldn't be a Chappelle production if it didn't contain the comedian's biting wit, killer timing and jokes about sensitive subjects, such as racism and the barrier between social classes. He comments about the disparity between certain neighborhoods in Brooklyn, how one street looks like "The Cosby Show" coming back from a commercial break, while a street next to it looks more like "Good Times." The jabs aren't bitter or in bad taste, though, just honest.

"Dave Chappelle's Block Party" is a great return for the comedian, who left his cable show and a $50 million contract in 2004 to visit Africa and clear his head. The talent of Chappelle and all the artists is undeniable, and music fans shouldn't be disappointed. We can only hope that Chappelle decides to return to the mainstream in some way or another, continuing to push the envelope but, most importantly, entertain us.

OH! Now I understand why people get into car wrecks. It's because we're racist...

“And finally, I would say that, you know, we are a little bit out of touch in Hollywood every once in a while, I think. It’s probably a good thing. Uhm, we’re the ones who talk[ed] about AIDS when it was just being whispered. And we talked about civil rights when it wasn’t really popular. And we, uh, you know, we bring up subjects … we are the ones … this Academy, this group of people gave Hattie McDaniel an Oscar in 1939 when blacks were still sitting in the backs of theaters. I’m proud to be a part of this Academy. I’m proud to be part of this community. I’m proud to be out of touch. And I thank you so much for this.” - George Clooney, accepting his Best Supporting Actor Oscar for Syriana

Best acceptance speech from the night.

Alright, Alright. I admit my defeat to my brother. But don't expect any cash or checks in the mail, Daniel. My continued friendship is your reward.

Words can't express how dissapointed I am that Crash won. I watched it for the first time Saturday night and at the end, when the camera pans up to the Los Angeles skyline and fake snow falls, I said "You're kidding me. It can't be over," out loud in my apartment. Granted, it has a few shocking moments, but no substance to justify them or explain them. It was interesting, but Crash was in no way of the same caliber of Brokeback Mountain, Capote, Good Night, and Good Luck, or Munich. Come to think of it, Speilberg's Munich was jipped at this year's award shows. Oh well. I'm going to pretend it didn't happen.

"In popular culture, things are getting worse. You know, I can give you -- I could sit here and give you examples all day. Let me just give you this example, and this is a controversial example. This gay cowboy movie -- and it's going to win, you know, a lot of awards all over, and they're -- the media is pushing this like crazy." - Bill O'Reilly

While some are complaining that Hollywood's "liberal" agenda led to the serious and controversial Best Picture Oscar nominees, they'd should first step back and consider whether any film that had more mild or family-friendly content was as well-executed or on the same par as the nominees. Sure, you might have liked End of the Spear - though I can't imagine why - but you must admit that technically, it sucked. If conservatives are so angry about this so-called agenda of a business almost purely in it for the money, then maybe they should venture into the business themselves or support filmmakers with their values. All the Best Picture nominees deal with pertinent cultural issues in our society. These issues are everywhere - in our churches, schools, work places and in the news. Shouldn't we be discussing homosexuality, the role of the media, the role of politicians, and terrorism in our art? Or is it because the conclusions the the artists come to don't line up with what the conclusions of the conservatives, hence the latter's anger? Can you really not learn anything from one of these movies, even if you don't completely agree with all the subject matter? Quit whining that Hollywood doesn't follow mainstream American "values." Get off your keister and do something about it yourself.

Now, for the Oscar picks. My brother and I are having a competition, though I haven't chosen winners from quite as many categories, and a lot of our picks are the same. If I win, I get a new video iPod. If he wins, he gets bragging rights. Sounds fair.

Best Picture: Brokeback Mountain
Best Director: Ang Lee, Brokeback Mountain
Best Actor: Philip Seymour Hoffman, Capote
Best Actress: Reese Witherspoon, Walk the Line
Best Supporting Actor: George Clooney, Syriana
Best Supporting Actress: Rachel Weisz, The Constant Gardener
Best Adapted Screenplay: Larry McMurtry and Diana Ossana, Brokeback Mountain
Best Original Screenplay:
My pick: Noah Baumbach for The Squid and the Whale.
Who will probably win: Paul Haggis and Bobby Moresco, Crash
Best Original Score:
My pick: Dario Marianelli, Pride & Prejudice
Who will probably win: John Williams, Memoirs of a Geisha
Best Original Song: "It's Hard Out Here for a Pimp," Hustle and Flow
Best Animated Film: Wallace and Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit
Best Foreign-Language Film: Paradise Now, Palestine
Best Visual Effects: King Kong
Best Cinematography:
My pick: Robert Elswit, Good Night, and Good Luck
Who will probably win: Rodrigo Prieto, Brokeback Mountain
Best Costume Design: Colleen Atwood, Memoirs of a Geisha
Best Film Editing: Claire Simpson, The Constant Gardener
Best Makeup: Howard Berger and Tami Lane, The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe
Best Art Direction: Jim Bissell and Jan Pascale, Good Night, and Good Luck
Best Documentary Feature: March of the Penguins
Best Documentar Short Subject: God Sleeps in Rwanda
Best Sound Editing: Mike Hopkins and Ethan Van der Ryn, King Kong
Best Sound Mixing: Paul Massey, D.M. Hemphill and Peter F. Kurland, Walk the Line

Fast Times at Hogwarts High

Oh, Hermione.

For all we know, this could be a studio still from the set of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, which features a scene dealing with the unpleasant—but all too common—realities of underage drinking, in which the young wizards get s***faced on butterbeer and draw genitals on Ron Weasley’s face with their wands after he passes out. Read more at the Defamer's post.

But, for your ultimate viewing pleasure, please, please click on this link and enjoy pictures of Emma Watson drinking with Jimmy Buffet playing in the background.

i actually made this issue's comic

That's me on the left. Good times.

If Gwyneth can wear Birkenstocks, I can wear Birkenstocks.

If I could be anyone else in the world, I'd be Gwyneth Paltrow. 1) She's talented; 2) She's married to Chris Martin; 3) She's beautiful; 4) She's won an Oscar; 5) She's married to Chris Martin; 6) She has a great sense of fashion; and 7) Chris Martin is the father of her children.

The Coldplay concert last night in Dallas was amazing, and words can't really express how I felt during several of their songs, such as The Scientist, Fix You, Little White Shadows, Clocks, In My Place, Swallowed in the Sea, Till Kingdom Come, a cover of Ring of Fire, etc. Some members of the audience were just sitting there, relaxing and taking in the show as if there were sitting at home watching them on TV. I say that if they have come all the way from England to put on a good show and give us their all, then it is our responsibility as fans to give our all to them in return. I sang every word to every song and am surprised I still have a voice. Concerts aren't what they used to be, I imagine, back before the days of MTV and iPods when concerts where the main way to see your favorite bands perform. I still enjoyed myself and hopefully didn't annoy too many people behind me by standing up the entire time.

ID does not belong in science class

I didn't post this earlier, mainly because I don't like a lot of it. But, having received compliments on it from a theologian and a physicist today, both of whom I respect, I'm considering that I might have been too hard on myself. I still don't love it though, but here it is anyways:

Published in Feb. 21 Optimist


No one has ever seen an electron swirling around the nucleus of an atom. Still, we all take quantum mechanics for granted and accept the scientifically proven electron as fact.

This assurance can't be given to Intelligent Design, the latest so-called theory that has slowly crept into the nation's public schoolrooms.

The battle of whether Intelligent Design, a new form of creationism, should be taught in public science classrooms is nonsensical. The pseudoscientific conjecture has no business being taught alongside what can be proven scientifically: evolution.

Intelligent Design conjectures that the account for living organisms is so complex, a supernatural entity must have been behind the formation. Most proponents of this conjecture, who claim it's a theory, do not necessarily want it to replace evolution in classrooms, but rather they want evolution highly scrutinized.

Intelligent Design plays to the commonly used meaning of "theory," which is a hunch or a guess. However, the scientific definition of theory is different. A theory in science can be experimented on and tested. True, the work of The Origin of Species author Charles Darwin leaves questions unanswered, but almost 150 years of scientific research and discovery rests in his corner. Theological questions spurred by the evolution debate are best fought in theology classes.

Christians should not be afraid for their children to sit through a class about evolution, whether out of fear it might hinder the child's faith or because they find the notion altogether beneath them.

Parents should not be afraid their children will doubt creation if they learn about evolution. Even if they begin to doubt, questioning one's faith is paramount to building a stronger faith. Learning about the other side of the debate is key to forming a more solid opinion.

I don't remember when I was taught evolution in middle or high school. The topic was likely discussed in 9th grade biology; but, having grown up in a Christian household, I learned about the theory of evolution while still holding on to my belief in a Creator God.

Students should learn about the realities and complexities of the world and how science, based on facts, helps explains these phenomena. Let them explore the issues and come to their own conclusions on whether a higher power must have been involved in the creation of the earth.

Intelligent Design followers discredit God by refusing to question him or by thinking his works far too complex to figure out. A line exists where one has to decide to believe in God or not, but the line for everyone is different.

Whether we are standing on top of a mountain, watching a loved one give birth or coming to terms with death, as humans we all examine our existence and find our own answers. Some of the greatest discoveries have spurred from man's desire to understand his creator and explore the seemingly unexplainable.

The debate between evolution vs. creation, or evolution vs. Intelligent Design, should continue, but it is not a scientific debate - it's a theological debate. Thus, it should be carried out in a theological venue and not the public school classroom.

The complexities of life have dumbfounded man from his beginning, whether he believes he came from a monkey or the breath of God. This debate should exist in a free and open marketplace of ideas.

After all, what creation is more beautiful, and more necessary now, than the art of speech and expression?

Why is hazing considered "bad?"

A letter I received about the Sing Song column (I left it as is and didn't edit it):

Sarah,
In your article in the Tueday Optimist, you left out the fact that Siggies, also worked very hard for what they infact did deserve. You also left out the fact that two clubs who "rivaled" were brought together by this mistake. I was there when they announced that Sigma Theta Chi won the women's division, and no girl in section A with a siggie shirt on showed much excitement, but only respect for the Alpha Kai girls who were victim to this mistake. Christ's love was shown by both clubs. Maybe you should write an article about that....or maybe that wouldn't get as many people's attention, and I guess that is what writing is all about(not so much about the amazing ministry opportunity you have here). Thank you for reading this
Your sister in Christ,
_____

OK. So many points to make, so little time. And, because they don't let me write rebuttals in the Optimist, this is my only platform.

1. I love it when people try and write intelligently but execute it poorly. They try to use big words or clever wording, but it just doesn't pan out.
2. There's a difference between opinion pieces and news stories. I'm entitled to be biased. Seriously. It's actually best that I have an opinion and occasionally take sides.
3. I didn't say anything about Siggies except the fact that they were the real winners and Alpha Kai girls were upset. I guess I could have mentioned that they handled it well, but it wasn't the point of my column and therefore wasn't worth mentioning. I'd rather write about me.
4. How were they showing Christ's love by competing against each other in two separate groups, groups that compete for members each year and now for a silly title that doesn't mean anything?
5. Don't ever, ever, sign a letter of criticism to me with "your brother/sister in Christ." It's patronizing and self-righteous.
6. Stop trying to make social clubs about God. Sure, some club members are in it for the purpose of making new friends and having a Christian bond or whatever, but percentage-wise, they are few and far between. Everyone wants to feel like they are a part of something, that they belong somewhere. I've seen it in the eyes of girls wanting to pledge one of the large clubs, and they're devastated when they're not chosen to join. The pledges who are lucky enough to win the popularity contest might have an experience where they feel they are growing in Christ, but what kind of Christian message is sent to those who aren't lucky enough to make it? How is that showing them the love of Christ? "Jesus loves you, so it doesn't really matter that we don't think you're cool enough to wear our club's colors."
7. Having a club that's about popularity, parties and socials is fine - just admit that that is what it's about. Why do we live in such an ingenuous culture at ACU? Just admit that you joined to feel cool or something and stop using trite phrases such as "It's a God thing," "As long as we're glorifying Christ through our actions," etc. Seriously.
8. I'm sorry that I didn't use my opportunity to minister to Optimist readers and instead chose the route of using theatrics, sarcasm and tongue-in-cheek phrases to make my points. I appreciate you pointing it out to me, and maybe if I had been in a social club and learned what it means to be "one in Christ" with 100 girls who look like me, talk like me, dress like me and think like me, I would have done otherwise.

...Stepping off of soapbox...Shaking head...Walking away...

Sing Song Gate '06 creates scandal

(Run in the Optimist, Feb. 21, 2006)

(I'm already getting e-mails about this, including one from the president of Galaxy. Oh joy.)

Sing Song Gate, 2006: Kai O's sobbing, Moonies swearing, and bystanders calling for the head of the director of Student Productions.

All of this commotion after a huge upset in the results from Saturday night's show led to a recount of the votes, which showed the women's social club winner changing from Alpha Kai Omega to Sigma Theta Chi, and the men's social club winner remaining the same: Gamma Sigma Phi.

Hopes were dashed, rivalries increased, and various sets of parents attempted to sooth their child's disappointment by reassuring them that their act was in fact the best and should have won.

Watching the hysteria unfold was, of course, a reporter's dream. We live off chaos and controversy. Most of the Optimist staff rushed back to Moody Coliseum on Saturday night once we heard a recount had been called.

We joined hundreds of others standing around until past midnight, chatting with long-time-no-see friends and waiting for Kendall Massey, the aforementioned director of Student Productions, to announce the night's true winners. Sing Song was our only concern.

But, while the mix-up was interesting and heartbreaking for some involved, the controversy only pointed to the truth that Sing Song has become too serious in its ripe old age of 50.

I've been in my class's act for four years now, winning a different place each year. We unfortunately peaked early and only won first place our freshman year as Ice Cream Men. As Merry Men our sophomore year, we were robbed, plain and simple, and I remember crying next to my now-roommate when we placed third, and the then-seniors claimed victory.

Junior year, we were ridiculous, having students from all years join us on stage to jump around and burn pent-up energy, relishing our fourth-place sweep.

But this year, as Jedi, we actually tried. And although the freshmen won (barely), and we placed second, we had the funniest show and ended on the high note of knowing we were the crowd-pleaser.

This semester, I spent roughly 43 hours in either Sing Song practices or performances, and Lord knows how many collective hours I practiced spontaneous choreography during the other three years. But all the energy I spent for a class act really doesn't compare to how hard the large club acts work to either defend or reclaim the first place title.

An extra week of vacation meant a week less of practice, and all groups were pushed to the point of exhaustion to prepare for the show. My Dad, who graduated in 1974, shakes his head at how bloated Sing Song has become and is confused at all the various judging requirements.

Back in his day, groups were simply judged on costumes and vocals. Now, a bent arm during choreography or flat note can determine a win or loss. Similar to sophomore year, the seniors were hosed by several judges who apparently expected a group of college kids to have the vocal precision of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.

Receiving brutal ratings for trying your hardest doesn't exactly help build self-esteem and, let's face it, sucks the fun out of the event. Healthy competition is great, but the lengths acts have to reach to win Sing Song have reached unhealthy proportions. The only way you can have fun in Sing Song is if your group wins, or if you enter the competition not caring about whether you win or lose.

Massey has done his best to make the production more lively and student-friendly, and the notion of firing him because of a voting mishap is ludicrous. The judging system should, however, be examined, and the dramatic emotions seen on Moody's floor Saturday should not go unnoticed.

The poor Kai O's were upset not just because they had mistakenly thought their club had won for the first time, but because they had put so much time and energy into a show, only to have the results not pay off.

I'm addicted to Sing Song and don't for a second regret my time spent on its stage. I'm still coming to terms with losing, though, and maybe when my kids are in Sing Song, I'll have forgiven my sophomore-year judges.

I only hope that by then, something in Sing Song will have changed and the production is focused on just being a good time, not a fight to the death.

the pictures say enough about my absence. thanks, sing song.

people are talkin'

The latest review: Focus Features provides 'Something' to talk about

funniest/saddest church sign i've ever seen

We saw this sign on our way to Austin this weekend, so of course we had to take a picture of it on our way back. Thanks, Zephyr Baptist Church.

attacking fellow staff members is fun

What the crap is the 'great boa?'

I really, really, really hated this movie. Don't see it.
Spear pummels toward hokiness, mediocrity

Republicans and Nazis...not too far apart

You scored as Democrat. Democrat 92% Anarchism 67% Green 58% Communism 50% Fascism 42% Socialist 42% Nazi 17% Republican 17% What Political Party Do Your Beliefs Put You In? created with QuizFarm.com

you say you want a revolution?

Protests like this would never happen at ACU because a) No one that important would ever come here; b) fellow students would probably shout at and eventually stone the protestors; and c) we signed away most of our First Amendment rights on the first day of Welcome Week, so there are probably rules against protesting. At least I can live vicariously through Georgetown Law students.

Year's best defy labels, exceed expectations

1/20/05


Despite disappointing box office revenues for most of the year, 2005's cinematic finale provided impressive and inspiring steps from daring filmmakers asking tough questions. That's a lot of vague adjectives that don't really mean anything because most of the year's top films are hard to categorize and describe. They're not your average popcorn-munching, building-exploding flicks to which the masses flock.

"Good Night, and Good Luck," which once on DVD will sit on a shelf next to this journalism nerd's copy of "All the President's Men," is perched high on most critics' Top 10 lists for good reason. George Clooney's ode to his journalist father, Nick, is a simple yet pitch-perfect depiction of CBS anchor Edward R. Murrow's battle with Sen. Joseph McCarthy during the Communist scare of the 1950s.

Clooney won the Freedom Award at the 11th annual Critics Choice Awards on Jan. 9 for "for illuminating our shared values of freedom, tolerance and democracy." In his acceptance speech, Clooney shared his award with other filmmakers in the room, noting that the spirit of freedom is alive in the year's top films.

"When I look at 'Munich,' at 'Crash,' at 'The Constant Gardener,' we are taking chances, and we are succeeding. This is a great night for the freedom of filmmaking," he said.

Whether in response to current societal trends or political battles, filmmakers are bringing stories of freedom to life, whether freedom from oppression, fear, addictions or prejudice, and the ultimate question of how far one should go to obtain and/or maintain freedom.

Though some provide more questions than answers, such as Steven Spielberg's harrowing "Munich," they refuse to take the easy way out by settling for fundamentalist answers. I was not only entertained or challenged by these films, but also left the theatre appreciating the experience and the artists' messages, which doesn't happen often.

Here are my choices for the Academy Awards Best Picture category if I ran the show:

"Brokeback Mountain"
Expanded from Annie Proulx's short story and directed by Ang Lee, Brokeback Mountain has been unfortunately and unfairly labeled as the "gay cowboy movie" since its inception as a screenplay. The story, however, defies labels and forces viewers to question their own beliefs and feelings, whether they're comfortable with it or agree with it or not. The affair between two ranch hands (Jake Gyllenhaal and Heath Ledger) is heartbreaking. After its recent win at The Golden Globes, Brokeback should and most likely will take home the Oscar.

"The Constant Gardener"
Not only is "Gardener" a mystery and thriller, it's a call to social justice and activism on behalf of the victims depicted: Africans taken advantage of by big pharmaceutical companies and those daring enough to expose them. Ralph Fiennes is so brilliant he almost goes unnoticed, becoming his compliant character so completely you forget he's acting.

"Good Night, and Good Luck"
Clooney brilliantly took a backseat role in this newsroom drama, letting veteran character actor David Strathairn embody Murrow. Shot in black and white, staged on only a few sets all indoors, rated PG and at a length of 93 minutes, Clooney captures the intensity of the time period and the importance of Murrow's words with old-fashioned flair.

"Munich"
When I think of Spielberg, I think of Happy Spielberg, as in the director of "E.T." or the "Indiana Jones" trilogy. I seem to forget that this is also the filmmaker who brought us "Schindler's List" and "Saving Private Ryan," easily two of the best WWII films. "Munich" runs along those themes in its depiction of the events surrounding the 1972 Olympics in Munich when 11 Israeli athletes were murdered by a Palestinian extremist group known as Black September. The Israelis retaliate, answering violence with violence. One of the most haunting and disturbing films I've seen.

"Walk the Line"
Winner of The Golden Globe for best picture musical or comedy, neither of which it really is, James Mangold's biopic of country legend Johnny Cash presents a raw look at the singer and his various addictions and struggles, as well as his ultimate redemption. And, unlike most of the above-mentioned films, it won't leave you depressed. Joaquin Phoenix's transformation to Cash can only be rivaled by Philip Seymour Hoffman's impressive transformation to Truman Capote in "Capote," another excellent film. Both won Golden Globes for their roles, but I believe the Oscar will end up with Hoffman.

wake up the dawn and ask her why a dreamer dreams, she never dies

Excerpts from philosophy class, Existentialism & Literature, notes from today:

"...how we view ourselves through the mirror of our own existence..."
"No general account of what it means to be human defines for us what it means to be human."
"...causes us to be in the world and assert interconnectedness of the world, and that's how you find yourself."
"transcendence -- you as a person are not simply reducible to your facticity."

These aren't my thoughts. No, no. These are just snippets of what I heard in class and chose to write down. You'll get to read more of these lines this semester, throughout which I will feel more and more stupid and doubt my existence all together.

To relax after those random lines, go to these Web sites:

Potter Puppet Pals - classic
How tall are you compared to famous people?
Chuck Norris facts (parents - be warned)

I'm officially ready to graduate. These people apparently aren't.

...from 13 original colonies...

Fifteen out of 50 isn't very good, and I only counted Michigan because I've been to the Detroit airport. My brother beat me by one state, but seeing as I can drop lines such as "One time, while swimming in the Atlantic off the coast of Brazil," or "One night, while my friends and I were walking around London," I am the infinitely cooler Carlson. My friends who have studied abroad can beat me, but they don't count. They just don't.

Jump down, turn around, pick a bale of Truth.

Stephen Colbert is the funniest man on television. If you don't watch "The Colbert Report" weeknights right after "The Daily Show" on Comedy Central, then firstly, we aren't friends, and secondly, you're uncool. His current crusade against The Associated Press and journalist Heather Clark is brilliant. In honor of him, I'll have my own On Notice and Dead to Me sections on this here blog. Pray you won't be on one of them one day.

Colbert: AP is America’s ‘number 1 threat’
Comedian wants credit for coining ‘truthiness’

Joel Jeffries / AP file

NEW YORK - Stung by a recent Associated Press article that didn’t credit him for coining the word “truthiness,” Comedy Central’s Stephen Colbert has struck back.

The world’s oldest news organization, Colbert says, is the “No. 1 threat facing America.”

On Wednesday evening, Colbert placed the AP atop the Threat Down segment of “The Colbert Report” show. What was No. 2?

Bears.

In October, on Colbert’s debut episode of the “Daily Show” spinoff, the comedian defined “truthiness” as truth that wouldn’t stand to be held back by facts. The word caught on, and last week the American Dialect Society named “truthiness” the word of the year.

When an AP story about the designation sent coast to coast failed to mention Colbert, he began a tongue-in-cheek crusade, not unlike the kind his muse Bill O’Reilly might lead in all seriousness.

“It’s a sin of omission, is what it is,” Colbert told The AP on Thursday. “You’re not giving people the whole story about truthiness.”

“It’s like Shakespeare still being alive and not asking him what ‘Hamlet’ is about,” he said.

The Oxford English Dictionary has a definition for “truthy” dating back to the 1800s. It’s defined as “characterized by truth” and includes the derivation “truthiness.”

Michael Adams, a visiting associate professor at North Carolina State University who specializes in lexicology, pointed to that definition and has said Colbert’s claim to inventing the word is “untrue.” (Adams served as the expert opinion in the initial AP story.)

“The fact that they looked it up in a book just shows that they don’t get the idea of truthiness at all,” Colbert said Thursday. “You don’t look up truthiness in a book, you look it up in your gut.”

Though slight, the difference of Colbert’s definition and the OED’s is essential. It’s not your typical truth, but, as The New York Times wrote, “a summation of what (Colbert) sees as the guiding ethos of the loudest commentators on Fox News, MSNBC and CNN.”

Colbert, who referred on his program to the AP omission as a “journalistic travesty,” said Thursday that it was similar to the much-criticized weapons of mass destruction reporting leading up to the Iraq War.

“Except,” he said, “people got hurt this time.”

ah, the good ole commute

Best editorial I've read in a while. I can do a pretty good imitation of the "Please stand clear of the doors" lady.

A New Tone in Washington

The Washington Post
Thursday, January 5, 2006; Page A14

SO METRO IS canning that nice lady who's been warning us all these years about the closing doors, and replacing her with a sterner voice. In an unusually (for Metro) adept public relations move, the transit system is inviting anyone to submit an audition tape to become the new, more authoritarian Sound of the Subway.

Which is fine, but if they're going to ask us to supply a new tone, can they really dictate the content? Isn't that some kind of violation of our First Amendment rights? We'd like to submit a tape that would go a bit beyond that stale doors-opening, doors-closing routine. We'd be happy to start with the standard, "Please stand clear of the doors." But why not take it a bit further? "Stand clear , we said -- that doesn't mean wiggle a couple of inches away from the door. Move in, for crying out loud. And when people are trying to exit, don't clog the passage, okay? Step out of the train. You can step back in after they've left. We're not going to leave without you.

"And you, big fella -- one seat per customer. You want to sprawl, buy a couch. And that rule about no eating and drinking? It's not optional, and we could do without the applying of makeup, too. No need to yell into your cell phone. And you, young man in Priority Seating -- yes, you -- are you going to pretend you don't see that old lady? All right, then, are we set? Thank you. Doors closing."

Maybe we won't win the audition. But we feel better already.

Considering I have nothing better to post about and have spent much of the past few days watching Law & Order episodes (curse you, New Years weekened marathons), I thought I'd post pictures of our poodle, Rusty, getting a bath. I can't tell you how funny this was.





Rusty is a hyper, fairly high-energy poodle. He's almost 3 and a half and barks at anything he sees and/or hears. It's annoying when his incessant barking wakes you up, but he's just too cute to dislike.







My Mom and Rusty.

I wouldn't be a good character on "Lost." I don't have a past. For my flashback sequences, the confused audience would see me sitting in a college newspaper office, or perhaps sitting in my apartment. Maybe, if they were lucky, they'd see me going to Wal-mart or even Starbucks. No, there is not much mystery behind this college senior, but I guess that's why no one's written about me.

I have, though, become addicted to "Lost" this break thanks to my brother, who brought home the first season on DVD. My Dad and I watched about 5 episodes a night before and after Christmas and now don't know what to do with ourselves. We've already missed half of season two, but I think I'm just going to read re-caps and try and catch up. Just can't live without it now. Thanks, J.J. Abrams.

The Abilene Reporter-News is publishing a series of religious columns I wrote for my Media and Religion class this semester. They chose to start off with this one, which isn't my best, but oh well. They also edited it incorrectly, so one sentence doesn't make sense. The sixth paragraph should start off like this: The PTC, an antiquated watchdog group that uses scare tactics to lure parents into complaining about TV shows not worth complaining about, has campaigns against MTV, FXÂ's show Nip/Tuck and releases lists of the best and worst shows on TV. I guess it was too much of a compound sentence for the Abilene readership. Thanks, Reporter-News. But I guess beggars can't be choosers.

hustlers grab your guns, your shadow weighs a ton, driving down the 101

Even at night, I could see the smog settled over the city as my plane landed, along with crawling lines of countless cars making their way down highways and interstates. An orange tinge from buildings and street lamps ensures that the sky is never completely dark.

My weekend in Los Angeles was filled with In-N-Out burgers, movies, nearly dying in traffic, celebrity sightings (apparently I walked right past Horatio Sans from SNL at the theatre on our way to see Capote, there was an actor sitting near us at Baja Fresh and we saw The Daily Show's Dan Bakkedahl in Hollywood with a camera crew, presumably filming a segment for the show), being a tourist in Hollywood, being accosted by street performers in Hollywood, hanging out in Santa Monica and seeing the Pacific Ocean. The visit was brief but memorable.

Here I am with Anakin Skywalker, Mr. Incredible and Sponge Bob Squarepants down at Hollywood and Highland in front of Grauman's Chinese Theatre. I hadn't intended on having my picture taken, but I unfortunately made eye contact with Anakin, who beckoned me with his finger and took the camera from my hands before I knew what to do. Daniel loved every minute of this scene and took my picture. After Anakin mentioned twice that they accepted small tips, I gave them each a dollar and we were on our way.

This is Dan Bakkedahl from The Daily Show, talking with various street performers across the street from Grauman's Chinese Theatre and the Kodak Theatre, where the Oscars are held. I'll have to keep watching The Daily Show next year to see if this segment, or something like it, makes it on air. After we saw him, we ate at Mel's Diner, which the diner in American Graffiti is based on, and sure enough Dan and his crew came in to eat there as well. I had trouble staring.

The pier at Santa Monica, Saturday night at sunset. Tourists and locals come down for the fishing or for the rides. The best part was the 3rd Street Promenade, a blocked off street of shops and entertainment that was alive with people.





The funnel cake we devoured while at the pier, killing time before dinner and our viewing of Brokeback Mountain at the ArcLight.











The Pacific, and a farewell to California.

Blame Canada

In case you were wondering how demented my brother and I actually are (you probably weren't, but oh well), here is an excerpt from a recent AIM conversation we had. For background, he was talking about reviewing Memoirs of a Geisha and how many are upset that Chinese actors were cast in Japanese roles. This had us talking about actors of different nationalities acting as Americans.

Daniel: i mean, casting a white guy as a mexican is just stupid, like in Touch of Evil. but casting a latin actor to play latin is deemed ok. and canadians play americans all the time, those sneaky bastards. like alan thicke and michael j. fox
Me: mike meyers
Me: tricky
Daniel: yeah
Daniel: they slip right in
Me: it's crazy
Daniel: we should exterminate them
Daniel: or put them in camps
Daniel: or something
Me: why that border isn't protected more is beyond me
Daniel: totally
Daniel: it's so long. too long to be unguarded
Daniel: dangerous
Me: i agree
Me: they just come on over as if they'd been invited
Daniel: elk or whatnot could just roam on down
Daniel: seriously. something should be done
Me: hmmm
Me: we need a plan
Daniel: we should just invade canada. turn it into a ski resort
Me: haha
Me: have you noticed how high up alaska is? they're practically canadian. we should kick them out of the union
Daniel: they're too close to russia. those commie bastards. acting like they're american. then why do your islands stretch like a chain to soviet land, huh? why?
Me: let's get rid of them
Daniel: with nuclear fire
Me: sounds like a plan
Me: blame canada
Daniel: you know bush would do it. he hasn't bombed anything in like 3 months. dude's got a build-up he needs to unleash
Me: if only we were his advisors
Daniel: we could be
Daniel: easily
Me: we could whisper our canada extermination plan into his ear
Me: it's true
Me: we'd have to pretend that we voted for him
Daniel: hmm. then no
Me: exactly
Me: i'll only go so far
Me: i don't really want to put my soul in jeopardy
Daniel: kill puppies? yes. but say i voted for bush? no way
Me: i'd rather be tortured
Daniel: luckily, we have the facilities for that
Me: thanks, cheney
Daniel: seriously, this whole place is messed up
Me: but not as messed up as Canada...those bastards. stop saying 'eh' after everything.
Daniel: and hockey? HOCKEY? no one likes hockey
Daniel: lame ice sport
Daniel: lame
Me: the maple leaf is a dumb flag
Me: sure doesn't beat the stars and stripes
Daniel: tell me about it. a symbol for syrup vs. the bold colors of righteous freedom? eat it, canada
Me: what the crap is up with mounties? your border? like we'd want to cross it. it's the canadians who are the invaders. our country is awesome enough as it is.
Daniel: you're not fooling anyone with your free health care and low crime, either, canada. we know it sucks up there
Me: south park got it right in their depiction of canadians. not really worth drawing.
Daniel: their little heads bouncing around
Daniel: and bryan adams...
Daniel: shame on you, canada
Me: "Let's make it all for one and all for love?" I still haven't gotten over that.
Daniel: i mean, it's a nice sentiment and all, but i don't know how you got sting to be involved with your scarred canadian mug. and what's up with that robin hood song? you made him sound like a wuss
Daniel: you're the wuss, bri
Me: truer words were never spoken.

bah, humbug

Does something about this strike you as inherently wrong? Yes, Christmas is a time for family, but look at it's name: Christmas. I'm sorry that it's stressful putting on a show, I mean, service, for thousands of people, but can it really be called work in the sense of punching a time card for a nine-hour day? And if you're afraid of low attendance, why not try encouraging your parishioners to come. Maybe that's just old fashioned, but at least it's not secular.

This scene is one of my favorites in the film To Kill a Mockingbird, which I just watched on TV. Atticus Finch guards his jailed defendant the night before his trial from the town people out for their own form of justice. My favorite part comes when Scout, Jim and Dill come running up through the middle of the crowd. Atticus looks terrified that his children are there and asks Jim to leave, but he refuses. While Scout is standing next to her father, she looks over and recognizes Mr. Cunningham, who had done business with Atticus. She talks to him and asks him how he is, mentioning that she goes to school with his son, Walter. This goes on for a while, with Mr. Cunningham looking embarrassed and Atticus looking amazed.

He replies back to Scout and tells her he'll tell Walter she said 'hello.' He then corrals the group of men to leave. Scout reminded him of his humanity, something hard to do in the midst of such hatred and mob mentality, something probably only the innocence of children can do.

Melanie's comment on my previous post had me thinking of great film adaptations of books. I have to say, To Kill a Mockingbird is one of the best. Usually, when I learn of a new movie coming out that is based on a book, I rush out to buy the book before the movie premieres. Right now, I'm reading Memoirs of a Geisha.

Why must all good books be made into probably not-as-good movies? I say this in anticipation of and nervousness toward The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, opening Friday. Let's hope this adaptation will be true to the story and not fall into the melodramatic category Peter Jackson made his own.

Anyone have any favorite book-to-movie adaptations?

five hours of awesomeness

Latest review: Pride & Prejudice. I've seen it twice and you all should see it, too. While it can never replace the 5-hour extravaganza brought to us by the BBC and A&E starring Colin "Wet Shirt" Firth (I stole that), it's still really good. I also, of course, have a mistake in this review as well. I spell the Bennet name incorrectly, although when I pulled out my copy of the book to verify the name - I spelled it Bennett - the back of my book had it spelled that way, which is incorrect. I blame finals, Dr. Marler, my fellow staff members for distracting me, rock 'n' roll, the 40 mph wind we had here, Colin Firth, caffeine, Joseph McCarthy and Jane Austen for this error.

Current reading: The Boxcar Children, Book 1. I have a 5th grade reading level...probably should admit it...

I should be studying right now. I have to figure out what exactly which area of the Intelligent Design debate I want to argue in my editorial for my Opinion Writing final. Personally, I'm tired of reading about monkeys, the Galapagos Islands, crazy people, Dover, Pa., and Pat Robertson. Intertwined with this research comes studying for my Bible final, for which I have to read 1 Samuel through 2 Kings and know random information. If I sit in my room to study, I'm distracted by my computer. I've been sitting in the living room, but if I look up, I see the rows and rows of pretty movies I own sitting next to the TV.

Ah well, I just need to make it through a few more days, then I have one semester left of not being an adult.


OK, one more picture of Colin Firth and I'll go back to studying (this is from the best scene in the miniseries):

concessions of the weak, part 2

Screw them all, screw them all. Screw, screw, screw them all.