Tom DeLay's goons didn't know it was satire?

While watching The Colbert Report, my favorite show, I enjoyed Colbert's bit on Wikipedia and his chosen word of the day, Wikiality. He discussed the ever-changing Web site and the everyman's ability to update pages on the free encyclopedia as they like, no matter if the material they are uploading to the masses is true. He then said that in about 15 minutes, his TV show's page will be updated with the tidbit of him talking about Wikipedia on his show.

Well, it took less than that. Within a couple of minutes, this was on his page:

"Wikiality
Stephen creates this word in his segment on Wikipedia on his July 31st show. It refers to changing meanings on wikipedia"

Now there are even more references to the show. There's also a warning on the page saying that because of recent vandalism, editing of the article by anonymous or recently registered users is disabled. Maybe too many freaks like me immediately went to the site and tried to throw their two cents in.

In a few more minutes, a video of his broadcast will surely be on YouTube.com. The information cycle seems to be speeding up. It's freaky, but oddly comforting. Maybe it gives us the feeling that somehow we're contributing to pop culture, spreading its messages along. We appreciate the art, and now we can instantly own it, manipulate it and send it to someone else. Or maybe we just think it's cool. Either way, I like it.

Hustlers, grab your guns

Things my brother brainstormed that we can do when I venture out to LA next week:

We could:
Get tattoos
Get something pierced
Go to the beach and pick fights with kids
Go to the grocery store and pick fights with old people
Go to the library and enact a short play

That's what we've got so far. We're taking suggestions.

I've read she hated Danishes

I know it's a classic, but Breakfast at Tiffany's has always struck me as odd. I won't even begin to ponder the beyond-politically incorrect supporting role of a very white Mickey Rooney portraying a very Asian Mr. Yunioshi, which is just disturbing.

Hepburn is of course delightful, but I feel like I need to have been alive in 1961 -- or at least be better acquainted with the idiosyncrasies of Truman Capote -- to appreciate the randomness. I approached the film expecting to like it because it's a classic and you're supposed to like classics, right? It's interesting, but it's not something I'd want to own and pop in every now and then. The older, hillbilly husband of Holly's storyline is just weird, as is her relationship with Paul. The eccentricity is appealing, but not enough.

I think the film's effect on pop culture -- with Hepburn's iconic black dress, huge shades and cigarette holder -- has surpassed the film itself. I'm more familiar with Deep Blue Something's one-hit wonder of the same name, but I've heard Capote's novel is good. Actually, I think I heard a character in a movie say it was good. The black dress is up for auction at Christie's in London and is projected to fetch about $130,000, all for charity.

I'll just remember the style and nice ending of Breakfast at Tiffany's, and not my confusion upon viewing the classic. Though I can attest to the truly magical feeling of walking into a Tiffany's and being blinded by sparkles. So wonderful.

This has been your random Sarah Ponders Cinema moment for the day. Sorry.

Whatevs.

Dear Mr. Quizno's Sandwich Maker Guy,

When I ordered my sandwich in your store Thursday, I did not appreciate you teasing me about not putting veggies on my sub. I don't like veggies. Lettuce is only good on a salad. All I was looking for that day was a nice, toasted turkey sandwich, and someone behind the counter at Quizno's who could make one.

"Really? No vegetables?" Yes, really. Why would I lie to you? Would I really have had you begin making my sandwich only to say "Sike! I was totally kidding - give me tons of lettuce!" I think not.

I've never liked veggies on sandwiches or burgers, etc. Blame my parents for not force-feeding them to me. Asking me again, "No veggies?" then smiling and saying "I'm just trying to keep you healthy" was the last thing I needed to hear. At least I don't work at Quizno's for a living. Ooh! Snap! Cold!

Is adding lettuce and tomato to a sandwich that already has turkey, cheese, ranch and bacon (mighty tasty) on it really going to up the health factor? Again, I think not. To make that healthy, why don't we take off the bacon, ranch and cheese. And then maybe the turkey. If you're so focused on health, why do you even work for a chain that carries sandwiches of this nature? Huh? HUH?

Today I went to Subway. They made my turkey sandwich, minus vegetables, no questions asked. Ha.

I win.

Have a nice day,

Sarah

You should all read this. I was able to thrown in my two cents on the best and worst TV-to-film adaptations in the paper today. You will probably have to register to read it, but if you love me, you will.

I Conquered Google. And: My high school Prom date is now ... gay?

164. That's the magic number. Apparently, you can only keep a single conversation thread going for 100 e-mails using Gmail (by just hitting the reply button back and forth). Once you hit 100, the system kicks the thread back to you and starts a new one. But, the second one only went 64 e-mails. 164. Try it. I defeated the system (with help from my brother). Yes, from June 19 to July 22, we sent 164 e-mails. Some interesting, many not so interesting, but all worth it. Take that, Google.
_______

Zach Braff has now made it his mission to chronicle the different stages of adulthood every few years. First, we had the gem "Garden State," where he examines the randomness of being a mid20sish guy. Now, with The Last Kiss, he's moved on to what it's like to be 30. I kinda like having him chronicling these milestones for me ahead of time. I hope he keeps going. What it's like to have kids, what it's like to have a mid-life crisis, what it's like to not live off of Social Security because it won't be there. All would be helpful.

Strikes against the movie already:
* Paul Haggis (the jerk who won an Oscar for "Crash") wrote the screenplay. Boo.
* Summer (Rachel Bilson) of "The O.C." fame is the temptress.
* Peter Sarsgaard isn't in this one.

If he inserts a couple of songs from The Shins, he might redeem himself. Either way, I'm sure I'll see it.
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Someone bent my car antennae. Seriously. Like, someone was walking past my car in a parking lot and felt the urge to randomly bend my antennae. Well, that really pissed me off. The radio still worked, but it looked dumb. So, going to Star Dodge Hyundai, I was able to have it bent back into shape. While I was there, one of the workers noticed that my vehicle registration expired in April. About four months ago. Not sure how I didn't notice that one. And of course, to give me a pass on inspection, I had to install new windshield wipers. The trip I took to have my antennae fixed ended up costing $41. It's always something.
_________

What do you do when you find out that a childhood friend of yours is gay? Especially when the means by which you found out were a phone call from another childhood friend sparked by rumors, and later verification of the new lifestyle thanks to MySpace? He was engaged to a girl six months ago. Going from engaged to leading an openly gay lifestyle with a boyfriend in six months is quite a jump. There's a story there. I'm sure I'll find out soon enough.

Uh, you're old enough to be my dad...

Current listening: "Under the Iron Sea," Keane.
Current reading: "The Time Traveler's Wife," by Audrey Niffenegger
Current watching: "Battlestar Galactica," season one (soon to be followed by season 2.0)

I work with some fairly odd people. A lot of the reporters at the paper are sociable and can form coherent and non-awkward sentences with strangers. But, as a copy editor, I don't really work alongside them. No, I work on the copy desk, which is next to the design desk. Thus, every day, I am forced to work with Creepy Design Guys.

Now, CDGs are pretty common at publications. I mean, how many creative and sociable people are willing to paginate inside pages for a living? Exactly. So, those of us on a career track have to cooperate with older people (in my case, men) who've given up on life. Or really, they don't want to give up on life, but they've found themselves stuck in the rut of working an average job, making below-average wages, yet not mustering up the ambition required to advance. So, they haunt newsrooms across America and annoy the crap out of the rest of us.

The CDG I have to work most closely with has got to be in his 50s or 60s. All he does is design the feature section pages, handling two sections for Sundays, as well as the paper's calendar. That's it. And I have to edit those pages. Let's call him Ned. Unfortunately, Ned is kinda crazy. Like, I-turn-around-at-my-desk-and-see-him-talking-animatedly-to-the-computer-screen crazy. We're afraid one day we're going to find him in a closet, talking to himself in a fetal position, rocking back and forth. Or else he'll just go postal and bring a gun to work. I really hope I'm off that day.

The other CDG, let's call him Joe, is about 42 and lives by himself in my apartment complex. He's short and insecure, and his eyes have the habit of wandering if you catch my drift. He tries to make conversation, but it usually just creeps me out in a Has-he-ever-been-on-America's-Most-Wanted? kind of way. He likes to shoot Styrofoam airplanes at us, or toss us his stress ball, or whatever. But mostly, he pouts when he doesn't get his way and no matter what we're doing, if I turn around and scan my eyes across the newsroom, I'll always meet his eyes. Always.

So, all this to say, pray for me. Pray for all the young people out there who must work with social pariahs who are holding on to our entry-level jobs. Pray for the young go-getters who are attempting to climb the corporate ladder, stepping over one old person at a time.

This is weird...

Watch me walk the graduation stage on YouTube.

I knew it.

You Belong in London

A little old fashioned, and a little modern. A little traditional, and a little bit punk rock. A unique woman like you needs a city that offers everything. No wonder you and London will get along so well.

What City Do You Belong In?

What's cooler than a Storm Trooper playing bass guitar? Nothing.

Most recent download: "Crazy," by Gnarls Barkley. You should watch the group's performance from the 2006 MTV Movie Awards. Yes, they are dressed as characters from "Star Wars." And yes, they are awesome.