She's got a way about her

I can't decide if I should praise or bemoan Facebook's technological drive-by known as the Mini Feed.

"[Big red heart] ____ is listed as in a relationship."

Helpful. My heart stopped beating for half a second, which can't be good, but at least you were honest and to the point, Facebook. Brutally honest, yes, but I appreciate the honesty all the same.

I think.

Who needs to hear gossip through that old mill when a glance at a computer screen can keep you updated?

One problem: Sometimes, my Mini Feed doesn't update quickly. For about four days, every time I logged into you, Facebook, at work, I saw the same posts -- including the same relationship listing. I GOT IT. He's in a relationship. Thank you, Facebook. Now you're just being brutal.