random musings on embarrassment

Why are people embarrassed when they fall down? Walking in a straight line or standing upright shouldn't be that difficult, but we somehow manage to trip or slip and fall. But, if we fall in public, why are we so mortified? Us interns had this discussion because one of us, Lucy, bit it last Sunday while riding her bike on the National Mall. She tried to corner to quickly and flew off the bike, hands and legs spread eagle and face first. She cut her knees so badly she should have gotten stitches, but was too stubborn. She stumbled to a nearby police car and waited for them to return while several tourists stopped to help her. They bandaged her up and the police offered her a ride home, but she refused, hobbling her way back to Georgetown. She told us the detailed story on Tuesday and then on Wednesday, as she was walking from the elevator to the front door of the office in the morning, while talking to an intimidating and important attorney, she tripped on her pant leg and fell forward again. The other staff member present helped her up while the lawyer picked up Lucy's lunch, which had flown from her hand. They had laughed slightly, but not enough to ease Lucy's horror.

Well, Lucy passed on her skills to me because on Thursday, as I was headed to lunch with fellow interns and a few staff members, I slipped and fell backwards. I've argued that my fall was worse than Lucy's second fall because 1. I was in nylons, heels and a skirt, which went a little too far up my legs for my liking, 2. I was in front of three boys, and 3. I fell on the concrete floor of a parking garage. I laughed, and so did Lucy and Courtney, but the three boys didn't really laugh. And here is the problem with falling: Other people make you embarrassed. If everyone had laughed heartily along with me, and not at me, which is different, things would have been fine. But the two staff members looked away, awkward and embarrassed for me, and so did the male intern, Shane.

When I was talking to Shane afterwards, he said he was sorry that he was one of those people who makes situations like falling down awkward for those who have fallen. He told me of how when he taught middle schoolers last year at a private school (that means uniforms - skirts for girls), one of the 8th grade girls, while playing volleyball with classmates, asked him to watch her serve. Of course, she bit it and fell, her skirt flying up completely. Shane said he acted like it never happened and that the girl handled it well, but that he had never been more embarrassed for someone in his life. I'm really embarrassed for her and I don't even know her. When you're young and haven't grown into your body, it's normal to trip and fall and stumble and what have you, but for adults it's a different story. I've seen men in suits trip and it is always startling for some reason. It just doesn't seem natural. I always act like I didn't notice. People should really laugh and joke around though. I think it's when people are embarrassed for other people, and those people sense that, that they make the situation embarrassing.

My situation wasn't really that bad and I don't really care about it. I think my dodgeball incident last Spring takes the cake for recent horrific moments. And again, in that situation, it was the guys who were present who made it awkward. Thanks, guys.